"Caveat Emptor," says suspected BTK Killer

According to sources, Dennis Rader, the suspected BTK killer, is depressed because his jail cell does not resemble anything he has ever seen in the pages of "Martha Stewart Living." Swinging into full damage control, wardens across the country have attempted to depict Mr. Rader as a madman in hopes of attracting more upscale residents. "Martha Stewart showed the country what a prison stay could be," said Jeffrey Castor, Wills County Prison warden, "Come to our county, commit a crime, and stay 6-10 years in our luxury accommodations. You won't be dissappointed."

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