NYC Protestor Rewards System
Dear Republican Convention protestors:
I think we learned from those good folks in Boston that a convention protest can be a fun and peaceful affair. However, we understand that with the recent troubles in Iraq, that there may be more protestors here in New York City. With that in mind we have developed a "Protestor Rewards System" that will only pay dividends if you all cooperate and behave peacefully. Should there be minimal arrests made during Convention week, all registered protestors will be entered to receive one of the following prizes:
One (1) Grand Prize Winner will receive an all expenses paid protest vacation of your choice: you can visit the bloody sands of Iraq, spend a week in a tree in Oregon, or visit a selection of six college campuses across the country. In addition to the trip the grand prizewinner will get a flag burning kit, without the flag. We hope you will choose any flag that is not an American flag. We here France's flag makes a great fire.
Ten (10) lucky first prize winners will receive autographed copies of Michael Moore's "Dude, Where's My Country?," Al Franken's "Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them," in addition to a private screening, and DVD copy of "Fahrenheit 9/11." In addition to this, we will throw in a copy of "Unfit for Command" and let you decide for yourself about John Kerry.
One hundred (100) second prize winners will get tickets to a Yankees game. There, you will sit in a special protest zone where you will protest the amount of money lavished on the Yankees and the amount of money in professional sports overall. Tickets are not redeemable for cash.
One thousand (1,000) Third Prize winners will receive an "I Love New York" pin and bumper sticker set.
All winners will receive an "I survived the Republican Convention '04" t-shirt.
Contrary to popular opinion the city of New York will not be distributing any "Get out of jail free" cards in connection with this promotion.
Remember, stay out of jail to be entered to win any one of these fabulous prizes and peace through anarchy!
Sincerely,
Michael Bloomberg, Mayor |
I think we learned from those good folks in Boston that a convention protest can be a fun and peaceful affair. However, we understand that with the recent troubles in Iraq, that there may be more protestors here in New York City. With that in mind we have developed a "Protestor Rewards System" that will only pay dividends if you all cooperate and behave peacefully. Should there be minimal arrests made during Convention week, all registered protestors will be entered to receive one of the following prizes:
One (1) Grand Prize Winner will receive an all expenses paid protest vacation of your choice: you can visit the bloody sands of Iraq, spend a week in a tree in Oregon, or visit a selection of six college campuses across the country. In addition to the trip the grand prizewinner will get a flag burning kit, without the flag. We hope you will choose any flag that is not an American flag. We here France's flag makes a great fire.
Ten (10) lucky first prize winners will receive autographed copies of Michael Moore's "Dude, Where's My Country?," Al Franken's "Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them," in addition to a private screening, and DVD copy of "Fahrenheit 9/11." In addition to this, we will throw in a copy of "Unfit for Command" and let you decide for yourself about John Kerry.
One hundred (100) second prize winners will get tickets to a Yankees game. There, you will sit in a special protest zone where you will protest the amount of money lavished on the Yankees and the amount of money in professional sports overall. Tickets are not redeemable for cash.
One thousand (1,000) Third Prize winners will receive an "I Love New York" pin and bumper sticker set.
All winners will receive an "I survived the Republican Convention '04" t-shirt.
Contrary to popular opinion the city of New York will not be distributing any "Get out of jail free" cards in connection with this promotion.
Remember, stay out of jail to be entered to win any one of these fabulous prizes and peace through anarchy!
Sincerely,
Michael Bloomberg, Mayor |
<< Home